The Same...Yet Different!!

Sometimes, it just baffles me that my girls are cut from the same cloth so to speak, but yet they are so different. I'm not saying that I would want them both to be the same person, have the same personalities, interest, goals...but sometimes I just have to sit back and laugh at how opposite they are. Its funny how one resembles each of us parents more than the other does...

Emalee for one, she definitely falls into the oldest child description. She's responsible, smart, over achiever, controlling, leader, uptight, too sensitive at times and perfectionist at most things. She holds on to her feelings and gets hurt easily. She takes more after her dad (after all they both are Aries) in a lot of ways, they are shy and more introverted, homebodies if you will. They are very short tempered, they both don't let things go easily. Very hard headed, but witty. One thing she got blessed with is she has his metabolism, those to can eat and eat and sometimes I don't understand where they hold it all. Lucky them lol.

Olivia on the other hand is alot like me. We're the extroverted type, outgoing, needs to always be out and about. We both don't hold on to feelings, more like brush the negative off and keep on truckin' lol. She's very carefree, laidback, go with the flow type girl. Though, like both Fernando and me, they both have that caring about others trait. We tend to take care of others before ourselves. One thing which I've been noticing alot recently that I'm sad that Oli got from me is the bad case of allergies. That's one thing I wish I could wave a magic wand and get rid of, to see her suffer breaks my heart. She has my slow like metabolism. We hold on to what we eat and are more "rounded" so to speak. I know she'll have to struggle like I've struggled my entire life and I want it to be easier for her.

The girls bump heads so much, it drives me insane at times. Emalee goes crazy because Olivia doesn't let her control her or mold her into a mini Emalee lol. Though, Olivia does look up to her big sister, she is still her own person and I hope it remains that way. As much as I want to go and hide when they get into their little tiffs, I think about how will they be as they get older. I can only hope that they can be close and help eachother out through the journey we call Life.

Update #1

Well 3 weeks ago I started the Biggest Loser Contest at with the ladies at my trainer. first weigh in was 198 and as of today I'm at 192 (btw, I don't usually tell anyone my weight lol, but I want to log as I go down this journey) I'm down 6lbs (and as of last week I was ahead in the contest...Yay me). But it seems like I'm getting bored already, I can't let myself down again this time. You see, I'm one that does soo well for about a week or 2, then I get bored and go back to my old ways...I'm determined not to let that happen again. I have soo much to gain from this (healthier lifestyle, get toned, weight loss, and not to mention the pot of $$ awaiting the winner) I need to stay motivated and focused. I haven't lost anymore weight in a few days, but thats fine I want to do this at a right pace so it stays off. This is the start of week 3 for me so I'm going to change it up a bit. I lowered my daily calorie intake goal from 1570 to 1340. It shouldn't be too hard considering I was always closing the day off with 200-300 cal left to use. Lets hope I can keep this up and on my next update in a few weeks, I haven't fallen off the wagon...summer is 5 months away...this year I WILL be ok with wearing a bikini.

The Battle of a Lifetime

Weight is something I've battled for who knows how long, most of my life I guess. I've had my ups and downs (very very lows) when it comes to my weight issues. I think maybe just a few times in my life since high school that I've actually been truly satisfied with how I looked and felt. I've probably tried just about anything...dieting, exercise, diet pills, and yes shamefully I've had a few eating disorders. I remember looking at vacation pictures when I was in my early 20's and so upset that I had let myself go the way I did and the way I looked, was not acceptable to me. I've been soo depressed at times when I hit my highest weight that I locked myself in my room on a Christmas day and just cried all day. Thats when I knew I had to do something. And I did, I worked out, pretty much watched what I ate and in 6months I was down 48 lbs. Then found out I was pregnant with Olivia (go figure lol).

I wish now that I had that will power that I had 7 yrs ago today. I can proudly admit I'm great at working out, I go to the gym, I've had a personal trainer since June 2009 and I work it hard. But its my eating that I'm ashamed of. I'm fine when I'm not home, but once I get home and walk into my house I feel like I just can't stop eating and so I eat, I snack, I pick, finish the girls food without thought...its horrible. Thats the problem with my weightloss. Something has gotta give. I'm tired of it. It does suck that the older you get the harder it is to just shed those lbs ugh.

So this past week I started the Biggest Loser Contest with my PT and we have 3 months, I'm determined to see some results, win or lose, I just want to see results. I've lost inches in the last 6 months, but the lbs have been up and down between 5 annoying lbs. My goal is to be down about 15lbs and I'll be happy. So anyways, along with the BLC, I also signed up with myfitnesspal.com it helps me figure out my food intake and what I should and shouldn't be eating to get to my goal in 3months. So I track my food, exercise and water intake. Its awesome. Its been hard, but I have to admit, knowing that I have to write down what I eat, helps me not want to really eat or snack soo much. Its hard sometimes because I'm an emotional eater and I eat when I'm bored, which makes me also want to get up and do more things to stay distracted. So this is it 2010 (30 years old) I'm on a better track in my life and its actually made me want to get family more active and right too. Wish us luck. Any suport and/or suggestions is greatly appreciated.
Thanks.

Where do I begin...

Lets see, what can I say? I'm new to blogging but not to writing, I've been writing, stories, journals, letters, etc since I was a kid. But since marriage, adult life, career and kids, all of that got put to the back burner, so I decided maybe I should start it up again...after all like a friend once stated : "It's very Theraputic" ;)

With that said, I guess the best way to start is a year in review of our life! 2009, what can I say about 2009. I turned the big 3-0 (sigh) and personally I think I grew up abit. It wasn't a great year, but it wasn't a bad year either, for me it was the year of lessons. Lost a few relationships of what I considered friends, but I guess you start to realize the people you want in your life and the people who really have no business being in your life, even though for a few, it harder to leave behind, but realized it was probably the best thing...sad thing is, some of them left without a fight so what does that tell you. Ummm, I some how became a baseball fan (Dodger's to be exact) thanks to Hubby, the girls and a few Friends who live and breathe baseball lol. Even named our Boston Terrier we got in March Dodger...lol. I got to reconnect with old friends and distant relatives thanks to good ol' Facebook. Survived our first year in our house...

I'm blessed to have my family and the friends that I do have. Without them I don't know how I would continue on each day. November of 2009 Nando and I had our 10 year wedding anniversary, wow 10 years. We've had our ups and downs but together we got through it and I love him soo much, its forever baby lol. I've learned to appreciate him more and the things he does for his family. He works hard to put the roof over our heads, make sure his 3 girls get what ever we pretty much ask for (which I'm sure is not always a good thing lol, but who's complaining)

Our girls are the best things to ever have happened. Emalee (10 yrs old), is beautiful, bright, smart, creative, independent, helpful, sweet, does her own thing her way and doesn't care what others typically think (sometimes including me sigh) and I'm so anxious to see where her talents will lead her in life. She at times is a bit hard on herself to perfect what ever it is she is doing...whether it be school work/projects, dance, coordinating her daily outfits, you name it and she tries her 150% at it. Always a A average student, I'm soo proud of her and I make sure she knows it on a daily basis!

Little miss Olivia, ohh Olivia (5yrs old), this girl, she is soo full of life, energetic, loud, outgoing, creative, theatrical, umm, loving, sweet, wild, stubborn, head strong, leader of the pack type personality lol. She started kindergarten this past year and loves school , when she is on break she constantly asked when she can go back to school. She's also smart and does very well in school. And may I had probably one of the best cuddlers around hehehe.

Both girls are dedicated to dance. We spend 4 days a week at the dance studio, they take Jazz, Ballet and Tap. Hoping to add probably Hip Hop (for Olivia) and Lyrical (for Emalee) later this year. And on weekends we are always on the go, I don't even know how I manage to stay on top of things. We are definitely the busy bees and social butterflies type of family lol

And before I end this novel of a blog, I just want to thank all my friends, I love each of you, so many of you have been there through thick and thin, through tears and fist, through text/IM vents lol. I seriously have the most awesome friends ever. And I just hope 2010 is a great and blessed year for us all...

Until next time.